more on Haiti, more on Jesus

I'm not really sure what I have been thinking, not blogging. How funny that when most people start blogs, on trips to other countries, I stopped posting. I think it stemmed from the idea that of wanting to just be in a place and not miss being there by writing about being there. But writing is beautiful because it means this experience of Haiti is shared. The greatest thing about being in Haiti is being loved by the Haitians. I'm learning a lot about simplicity here. Not simplicity of life as much as simplicity of love. I am so used to being able to have really deep conversations and really intellectual discussions about the bible and with the Haitians I am so limited that I do a lot of smiling and waving, a lot of good morning and good afternoon, and a lot of how are you. Which is the most surface thing ever but here it is not at all! That is an excellent way to love people and to be loved by people. Because when they smile at me, and they always smile and wave back, I feel incredibly loved. So it is my hope and my prayer that they feel the same. I think perhaps the most powerful thing is learnign how to enjoy Haiti and its people. Not coming here with any mission to accomplish, but seeing it as a GIFT that I would be invited into THEIR lives for the month that I am here, that they would patiently teach me their language, that they are happy to show me who they are, to laugh and talk with me. There is nothing forsaken about Haiti. It is lively and communal and musical. It has a pace where there is room for rest and enjoyment. Now, this is not to minimize the very real issues or the needs. But I had thought exclusively of the needs and really been thinking "poor Haiti" ever since the earthquake. But Haiti does not need our pity. And Haiti does not need us to bring Jesus because he is here! He is evident here...in their eyes, in their lives, in thier singing, in their prayers. In fact America could probably really use some Haitian missionaries! What I am finding daily is the wisdom of Pastor Leon who suggested to me the idea of partnership their ministry is founded on. When Americans and Haitians work together as partners with mutual respect and the understanding that each brings something the other could not do on their own, We should not minimize all that we have to offer, but we absolutely cannot minimize what the Haitians have to offer. It will be our loss. Now, I am considering the idea of actually blogging about what I do on a day to day basis. I've never thought that what I do would really be of interest to anyone else but in this case, it would allow people to know more about what I am doing, though it is not at all miraculous (I'm serious.Sometimes I just watch movies and hang out.That is not mission work.) God is quite miraculous. And what he is doing is worth talking about. And I am so so blessed to get to see that here in Haiti. Also, I am being prayed for. More than I can grasp and probably even imagine. And I am learning the very very real power of prayer. And starting to realize that when this seems to easy it is the mysterious work of prayer and not just easier than I expected. I can feel these prayers. I can feel being cared for and loved. It is prayer that makes me flexible, keeps me from being sick, provides me with strength. Nothing in me would allow me to do this and to live this on my own. So thank you. Or merci, in creole. And I am writing as a little tiny token of gratitude for the lavishing of prayer that is on me. It just amazes me to think that there are people in another country, thousands of miles away petitioning God on my behalf and thinking and praying about Haiti with fresh passion. That is just as beautiful as going to Haiti. In some ways more so,. because you are not given the recognition or the experiece of actually being there. Prayer is not easy. And yet, I am faithfully being prayed for. What a gift! What a gorgeous body Christ has. So, I will do my best to write as much as I possibly can, even the little things I think no one would want to know. Today, I got to work with Haitians building an arch and a school. Kids came and went all day, staying to talk and joke with us as we worked. There is a man wo speaks spanish so its been great talking to him. Sort of strange to be an American speaking spanish to a Haitian whose native language is Creole in Haiti. All of the workers are always so excited to see us and have big smiles. I have never seen so many smiles or smiled so much as I do here in Haiti. So a full day-woke up at 5ish, read exodus 32-34 which is absolutely gorgeous and very applicable, got to know some great girls who are here for a week, worked all day at the site which is called rue patriot, had a staff meeting where Pastor Leon really makes it a family meeting, ate dinner under an awning during pouring rain, had a heart to heart with two of the girls about passions, missions, poverty, and Jesus, and now am writing. I also have been thinking a lot about dependence on Christ, how unattracted I am to though of having to depend on anyone, and the idea of being in prayer while at work. Not necessarily literal prayer, but just keeping company with God, asking him to do what I cannot in myself, and seeing all the moments where I am not working, which is an awful lot more than I am comfortable with, as moments for prayer instead of that uncomfortable urge to be productive.